A Person's Guide to Things

So what you got here is yet another self-professed expert's attempt to list the greatest films of all time. I had a difficult time compiling this list because I wanted to stick very closely to some self-imposed guidelines.
Number one... I had to have actually seen the movies. I'm sure plenty of great films have been omitted because I haven't had the time or access to them (i.e. Life is BeautifulThe Seven Samurai Hate).
Number two... They all had to be good movies, i.e. at least well written, well acted, cool sets, or interesting stories etc. It was hard not to include some movies that were so bad that I actually enjoyed them (Yor, Hunter From the Future; Surf 2). Also, I didn't include a number of films that, despite having won lots of Academy Awards, were actually a load of crap, over rated, or boring (Forest Gump, Braveheart, Citizen Kane). Now, I wouldn't say that all of the movies here are of the same caliber, but in my books these are all "good" movies. I'd give each one at least an 8 out of 10 (okay maybe 7.5). The movies I consider to be the ALL TIME GREATS are indicated with the .

So here we go...

A * B * C * D * E * F * G * H * I * J * K * L * M * N * O * P * Q * R * S * T * U * V * W * XYZ

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After Hours  A poor bastard goes on the date from hell and ends up being hunted down by an angry mob.

Aguirre: Wrath of God  Period piece about a group of Conquistadores who get lost while seaching for Eldorado in the Amazon jungle.

Alien  Killer alien creature hunts down members of a space mining vessel. Great suspense.

Aliens Excellent sequel to Alien. Space marines return to do battle with a whole planet of killer aliens.

Angel Heart    A  detective takes a contract from Lucifer. I wish the whole world looked as cool as Coney Island in the winter.

Animal Crackers  Three cheers for Captain Spaulding , the African explorer... Three cheers also for the rest of the Marx Brothers as they take the starch out of some stuffed shirts.

Animal House    The unruly members of the Delta House fraternity turn staid Faber College upside down. Perhaps John Belushi's best role.

Apocalypse Now    This the film that gets my vote for the #1 movie of all time, and has since I first saw it twenty-odd years ago. Francis Ford Coppola updates Joseph Conrad's brilliant novella "Heart of Darkness" into the Vietnam War. A great script, excellent scenery, and impressive performances create a moving and multi-layered experience worthy of repeated viewings

Arsenic and Old Lace  Cary Grant is the only sane member of a murderous family that includes his two sweet old aunties who poison old men and bury them in their basement.

Atomic Cafe  Combining documentary footage and period music, this film exposes the idiocy of the American love affair with atomic weaponry during the 1950's

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Bad Day at Black Rock   A one armed man comes to a one horse town and uncovers a conspiracy.

Bad News Bears   A bunch of misfit and cast off kids get put on the same baseball team and  battle each other as well as the other teams. This is the movie that unfortunately spawned all those crappy Mighty Ducksish films that we have been plagued with recently... don't let that scare you off.

Bedazzled   (1967  version) Dudley Moore is a short-order cook who sells his soul so that the woman of his dreams will fall in love with him. Peter Cook plays the Devil perfectly.

Being John Malkovich   One of the oddest movies in a long while.  An out of work puppeteer finds a portal into John Malkovich's head, that allows anyone to "be" John Malkovich for 15 minutes, and then spits them out beside the road on the New Jersey turnpike.  John Malkovich is great as a man very much like himself.

The Big Lebowski   If you've never known some worthless hippie slacker, or never smoked a joint yourself, you might want to give this a miss. The rest of you will enjoy this twisted revenge comedy.

The Big Sleep  Humphrey Bogart in his definitive film noir detective role.

Big Trouble in Little China  Action comedy doesn't get much better than this. Kurt Russell battles an ancient Chinese demon and his minions.

Blade Runner   Harrison Ford's best role (yes, even better than Han Solo). He plays a futuristic detective hunting down some escaped replicants. This is one of the coolest looking movies I have ever seen. For better or worse, I believe that this is a true vision of the future

Blazing Saddles   Usually I hate Mel Brooks, probably because the first film I ever saw of his was this hilarious spoof Western, and I've expected the rest of his work to live up to this standard. How wrong I was.

Bliss    (1985  version) Australian film about an advertising executive who suffers a heart attack, and afterwards begins to see his life as it really is, either that or he's died and gone to hell.

The Blues Brothers  Great music, great car chases, great suits, great deadpan comedy from John Belushi and Dan Ackroyd.

Blue Velvet    Under the banal veneer of every small town there must lurk a sordid underbelly of sex, drugs, blackmail and murder... at least according to David Lynch.

Bob Roberts    Pseudo-documentary about the election campaign of a right-wing folk singing politician. Great soundtrack was never released because the makers didn't want real politicians using the songs (The Times They Are A-Changing Back)

Bottle Rocket  Two semi-bumbling, but motivated, brothers go on a low visibility crime spree.

Box of Moonlight   Uptight executive, with some unplanned-for time on his hands, goes for a drive in the country and discovers The Kid.

A Boy and His Dog   Despite starring a young Don Johnson, this is an excellent post apocalyptic story about the adventures of a dumb boy and his smart dog.

Brazil    This movie out-1984's 1984. This black comedy from Terry Gilliam is set in a grim, totalitarian future(?) of endless bureaucracies and threats, both real an imagined; and one man who dreams of getting away.

Breaker Morant  Set during the Boer War, this true story is about the court-martial of three soldiers for following orders.

Breaking Glass   Hazel O'Connor is punk rock girl who starts her own band, then has to battle against selling out.

Brother From Another Planet  Low tech sci-fi film by one of my favorite directors, John Sayles. This is the story of an escaped mute black slave from another planet and his attempt to blend in with the denizens of New York City.

Brother's Keeper      A documentary about the trial of two backwoods brothers who were charged with the murder of a third brother (probably a mercy killing).  They are very simple men and the media attention (including the documentary crew) seems to freak them out.

Burn!  Marlon Brando is an agent of British financial/governmental interests who, during the 1800's, is sent to a Caribbean island to foment revolution amongst the native sugar cane farmers with the idea of overthrowing the Portuguese colonial government. Then, several years later, he has to return to convince the same revolutionary farmers to cease their rebellion against the British Sugar Company. Yes, its a long movie, but worth it.

Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid  With the exception of a regrettable "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head" segment, this is a great Western starring Robert Redford and Paul Newman and directed by George Roy Hill.

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Cabinet of Doctor Caligari  A 1919 German silent film about an evil carnival hypnotist and the sleepwalking slave who does his every bidding. Great surreal sets that really ad to the nightmare quality of the movie.

Catch-22     Great ensemble cast does justice to Joseph Heller's WWII novel about lunacy in the face of even greater lunacy.

The Changeling   An excellent ghost story that that doesn't need guts or gore to scare the pants off of you.

City of Lost Children   A French film set in a grimy future about a mad scientist who, unable to have dreams of his own, kidnaps children to steal theirs.

Clerks     Low budget film about one day in the life of a couple of surly/sad sack minimum wage convenience store clerks.

Clockwork Orange  Ultraviolent vision of youth gangs of the future, and society's attempts to turn them into policemen.

Cool Hand Luke   Paul Newman is a rebellious young man sentenced to hard labour on a chain gang in the deep South. A triumph of the human spirit in the face of great odds-type movie.

Croupier    British film noir... an aspiring author falls back on his skills as a Croupier. Soon the corruption sets in.

Crumb     A documentary on the life of controversial underground comic book artist, Robert Crumb. What emerges is the story of an odd individual who seems comparitively normal once you meet the rest of his family.

Cyrano De Bergerac     (1950 version)  A swashbuckling love story about a gentleman who allows a large nose to quash his hopes of happiness. This movie has some of the best insults and sword fighting one could hope to see in a motion picture.

Dark Star    A hilarious low budget sci-fi movie about the crew of a space ship on a multiyear mission to blow up unstable planets for future colonization purposes. Already several years into the space, they hate their jobs, each other, and have an insubordinate intelligent nuclear device to deal with.

Das Boot     German film about submarine warfare in WWII. Extremely claustrophobic.

Dawn of the Dead   Zombies are running (well, actually walking) wild around the countryside. Society is coming apart and our heroes are holed up in an abandoned shopping mall. All is going fine until the zombies get in.

Dead Man   Jim Jarmusch's stab at a Western has Johnny Depp as an accountant from back East who ends up branded as a killer and hunted down by a posse.

The Decline of Western Civilization   Punk Rock documentary showing the L.A. scene circa 1981. The late Darby Crash (of the Germs) makes watching the film Sid and Nancy redundant.

The Dirty Dozen   A great war movie as a bunch of condemned criminals are given one last chance at a pardon, provided they agree to go on a suicide mission. Great performances all around from the likes of Lee Marvin, Telly Savalas and especially, John Cassavettes.

Do the Right Thing  Spike Lee's story about one hot day in Harlem and the racial tensions that arise as the temperature goes up.

Dog Day Afternoon  This true story has Al Pacino as a bank robber who ends up taking hostages and becoming ringleader of a media circus, all because he needs money to fund a sex change operation for his boyfriend.

Double Happiness  Included mostly because of its spot on depiction of Vancouver, my hometown, this is still a fine movie about a Chinese girl's dilemma as she is torn between her traditional family and her Western boyfriend.

Duck Soup  The best Marx Brothers film by far. An anti-war film about the tensions that arise between Freedonia and its rival Sylvania, as the brothers fan the flames on both sides.

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Eat the Rich    A vegetarian's delight as a former waiter and his friends try to start a revolution to overthrow the government (run by a professional wrestler) and take the filthy rich down a peg or two.

Ed Wood     Biography  of the cross-dressing Z-movie director Ed Wood. As tempting as it was, none of his movies made this list. Martin Landau does a great job depicting the washed up, morphine addicted Bela Legosi.

Eight Men Out  John Sayles again... I could have probably listed all of his movies here (except maybe the somewhat tedious City of Hope). This is based on the true story of the 1919 Chicago White Sox who conspired with gamblers throw the World Series. Very even handed, and well acted. You don't have to even like baseball to enjoy this movie.

Elmer Gantry  Burt Lancaster is a salesman who, after going to a revival tent meeting, decides that being an evangelist may be his true calling.

Erik the Viking  Terry Jones' educated commedy starring Tim Robbins as a Viking who sails over the edge of the world in an attempt to reach Valhalla.

Excalibur   I generally enjoy reading Lord of the Rings-type fantasy stories, and it never ceases to piss me off that all movies of this type suck. This is one of the very few exceptions... it tells the story of King Arthur and Merlin (without having to resort to Richard Gere).

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Farewell, My Lovely   Robert Mitchum is the detective Philip Marlow. When he attempts to find the ex-girlfriend of gigantic mobster Moose Malloy, he becomes involved in a much larger case.

Fargo  A Coen brothers film (always a sign of quality). Based on a true story about a North Dakotan car dealer who devised a scheme to have his wife kidnapped, but of course, everything went horribly wrong. I love the scene where one of the kidnappers searches vainly for a landmark in the middle of winter in the middle of the middle of nowhere.

Fear of a Black Hat   Mockumentary of the legendary rap group N.W.H. (Niggaz With Hatz) is one of the funniest films ever made. I'm still laughing at the title of one of their albums... Don't Shoot till You See the Whites.

A Fish Called Wanda  Several members of the Monty Python troupe appear in this hillarious film about American jewel robbers who attempt to doublecross their English cohorts with the help of an unwitting barrister (John Cleese).

Fishing With John    Docucomedy wherein, musician and sometime actor John Lurie takes such people as Jim Jarmusch, Tom Waits (Pt. 1), Willem Dafoe, Matt Dillon (Pt. 2) and Dennis Hopper (Pt. 3) on fishing excursions to exotic locals all over the world.

Forbidden Planet  Classic 1950's sci-fi about explorers on a distant planet who find a long lost scientist, his beautiful daughter, and something else.

42 Up  A documentary based on the proverb "Give me a child at 7, and I will show you the man". The film-maker took a group of 7 year old English boys and girls and has interviewed them at 7 year intervals. Very interesting studies of race, class and gender, as well as being genuine human interest stories.

The Four Musketeers  Sequel to, or actually the second half of The Three Musketeers. The continuing swashbuckling adventures of d'Artangan, Aramis, Athos, and Portos as they attempt to thwart the machinations of Cardinal Richeleu and Milady.

Freaks Very weird 1930's movie about sideshow freaks and their fiendish vengeance upon a person who crosses them.

Fresh    The story of a brilliant inner city boy who attempts to rise above the forces that want to keep him down.

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Gallipoli    Australian film about the disasterous Gallipoli campaign of WWI, and two youths who are sent into the slaughter.

Get Crazy     Much like Rock n Roll High School, the kids must get together to save their music venue.  Lotsa cool musicians including Lou Reed and a great band called Nada.

The Godfather  The story of a Mafia family. Hugely hyped as a great movie... for good reason.

The Godfather II  This sequel to the Godfather is almost as good as the first movie.

The Gods Must Be Crazy   A Coke bottle drops out of a plane and lands near an isolated tribe of African bushman.  Soon this new item is disrupting the harmony of the community and one of the bushmen sets out on a journey to the edge of the earth to get rid of it.

The Golden Voyage of Sinbad  Exciting Sinbad adventure with cool Ray Harryhausen stop action animated creatures; like sword fighting skeletons.

GoodFellas    Based on a true story of a guy who gets deep into the power structure of the Mafia, becomes addicted to coke, gets busted, and narcs everybody out. Robert DeNiro, Joe Pesci and Ray Liotta make excellent mob guys.

The Good, The Bad and The Ugly   The all time classic spaghetti Western, by Sergio Leone. Clint Eastwood is actually only marginally Good, and then, only compared with the Bad (Lee Van Cleef) and the Ugly (Eli Wallach). Its every man for himself as they fight each other and try to avoid getting caught up in the American Civil War while searching for buried treasure. Ennio Morricone's soundtrack is perhaps the best ever.

The Great Escape  Loosly based on the true story of the largest POW escape of WWII. Tons of cool actors (Steve McQueen, James Garner, James Coburn, and Charles Bronson, to name a few), and an exciting story.

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Hard Boiled    No one directs a gunfight scene like John Woo. Taking up where Sam Peckinpah left off... everyone in this movie dies a beautiful death. This film probably has the highest bodycount I've ever seen.

Hard Core Logo  The last tour by an aging punk rock band. All of the festering grudges get aired out and despite themselves they have a somewhat good time.

Harvey  Jimmy Stewart (god I hate him) makes the list because this is a great movie about an alcoholic and his imaginary(?) friend, a giant rabbit named Harvey. Naturally everybody thinks he's nuts.

Head  The Monkees star in a movie written by Jack Nicholson. A stream of consciousness freakout where they deconstruct their own myth.

Hearts of Darkness   A documentary made by Eleanor Coppolla during the filming of Apocalypse Now. Watch as Francis Ford Coppola goes way off the deep end. He makes a better Kurtz than Brando did.

Heathers The ultimate high school revenge fantasy as two outsiders kill off the popular crowd.

Heavy Metal Parking Lot   A short film documenting the crowd outside a Judas Priest concert somewhere in Maryland.  Those fans rocknfuckinroll.

Heavenly Creatures  True story of two young New Zealand girls who become very close and, worried that their parents will try to separate them, resort to murder.

Hell is for Heroes   Authentic seeming 1950's WWII movie starring Steve McQueen, James Coburn and , of all people, Bob Newhart. A gritty depiction of the last stand of a small squad of soldiers.

Henry V  Kenneth Branaugh brings Shakespeare's play into vivid life. Five minutes into the movie you even forget they are speaking in Shakespearean English. Great story, great acting.

Henry, Portrait of a Serial Killer   When I saw Natural Born Killers and Kalifornia I was unimpressed, mostly because I had already seen this movie. Playing like a mixture of snuff film and documentary, this is one of the creepiest, most disturbing movies I have ever seen. I'm not sure if I even recommend it, except to say that it is very well done.

Highway 61  A small town Canadian barber and a beautiful cocaine dealer drive a body from Northern Ontario to New Orleans whilst being pursued by the Devil.

Hurlyburly    Cocaine-psychosis anyone?  Sean Penn give a crazed performance as a self involved Hollywood player gradually losing touch with his friends and himself.

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The Ice Storm   Some people remember the 1970's as being like Boogie Nights, I remember it as being more like this movie. The kids try to discover themselves while the adults try to act as hip as they think they are supposed to be.

If... Malcolm McDowell stars in this story of murder at an English public school.

The Imposters   Stanley Tucci and Oliver Platt are two out of work actors on the run in this wild comedy that owes much to the slapstick antics of Laurel and Hardy and The Marx Brothers.

Invasion of the Body Snatchers (1956 version)  This is a great tale of paranoia and conformity. Do yourself a favour, turn it off or leave right at the end (where the doctor goes crazy trying to warn people on the highway) and avoid the tacked on "but everything was all right in the long run" ending.

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Jacob's Ladder   Nightmarish horror story of a Vietnam vet who believes he is being attacked by demons.

Jaws  Killer shark terrorizes seaside community... what more could you ask for???

Johnny Got His Gun  The story of a young soldier who is dreadfully wounded in WWI and lives on in a veterans' hospital, unable to communicate or do anything other than relive his memories.

Kagemusha  Akira Kurosawa's samurai story of a warlord who recruits a common criminal to be his double in case of an assassination attempt. Upon his untimely death,  the double takes over.

Kind Hearts and Coronets  Alec Guiness stars in this comedy, playing several members of an aristocratic family who are being bumped off one at a time by a greedy heir.

Koyaanisqatsi    More of a psychedelic experience than a movie. Francis Ford Coppola's documentary about the world and its' peoples. Uses innovative camera angles and speeds to make some interesting points.

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Last Exit to Brooklyn  The ugly underside of Brooklyn in the 1950's during a bitter longshoreman's strike.

Last Night   Don McKellar wrote, directed and starred in this thoughtful and somewhat sad comedy about 6 people trying to deal with the fact that the world will come to an end in just a few hours.

Leningrad Cowboys Go to America   A Finnish film about a offbeat musical group who try to tour America.

The Long Riders   A Western about the James-Younger Gang. Stays pretty close to the actual story, and benefits from having real brothers (Carridines, Keachs and Quaids) playing the brothers who made up the gang. Great Ry Cooder soundtrack too.

Life of Brian   No one can satirize a subject like the Monty Python crew and nothing is as wide open for satire as organized religion. The perfect match is made in this tale of the boy who was born in the manger next-door to Jesus.

Living in Oblivion  The headaches of low to medium budget filmmaking are more than evident in this film about film. Steve Buscemi is the director who has to deal with cranky dream sequence midgets, meddling stars, and unrequited love.

L.A. Confidential  Film noir treatment of a good cop - bad cop - in between cop story, involving 1950's style tabloid journalism and a prostitute that looks like Veronica Lake.

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M  Peter Lorre's first starring role was in this morbid masterpiece directed by Fritz Lang. Based on the true story of a German child killer, Lorre is truly disturbing as the creepy villain. Within a few years of being filmed, many of the creative minds behind this picture had been hounded out of Germany by the Nazi Party.

Mad Max A post nuclear future where people in cars do battle on the lawless roads in the outback of Australia.

M*A*S*H    Robert Altman's brilliant story about the antics of a group of misfit surgeons at a mobile army surgical hospital during the Korean War. Quite a bit different than the TV show of the same name.

The Magnificent Seven   Hollywood Western remake of Akira Kurosawa's masterpiece The Seven Samurai. A small band of men is gathered together to protect a small Mexican village from the depredations of a vicious gang of desperados. This movie has all those excellent 1960's actors like Yul Brenner, Steve McQueen and Charles Bronson that you would want to see together in a Western.

The Manchurian Candidate   Cold war thriller about a former P.O.W. who has returned to the United States unaware that he has been brainwashed to carry out the assassination of a Presidential candidate.

The Man Who Would be King   Based the Rudyard Kipling tale about two British soldiers of fortune who, in the 1800's, travel into uncharted Afganistan and attempt to set themselves up as rulers.

Marty  For those who thought Ernest Borgnine could only play a thug, here he kicks ass as a lonely butcher searching, perhaps vainly, for love.

Matewan   John Sayles' story of a 1930's Virginia miners strike that turned violent. This is the American history that often doesn't get told.

Mrs. Parker and the Vicious Circle   Dorothy Parker was a great poet, author and possessed one of the most acid tongues of the 20th Century. This is her story

Mister Roberts  The Caine Mutiny with more humour... more humanity.

The Mouse Hunt    If those responsible for City of Lost Children had made a children's film it would have been this one. Two brothers try to evict a troublesome mouse from the creaky old mansion they have inherited.

Murder By Decree  What would have happened if Sherlock Holmes had attempted to track down Jack the Ripper? This film has more atmosphere than any ten other movies.

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Name of the Rose   A detective story set in a remote monastery during the Middle Ages. Sean Connery tries to find out who has been murdering the monks and why.

Naked  The world's worst houseguest arrives spouting obscenities and vicious observations, and sets about to ruin the lives of everybody involved.

North By NorthWest  Alfred Hitchcock's story of mistaken identity, suspense, and humour, as Cary Grant is chased by forces unknown.

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O Lucky Man!  This movie gave me a headache... in the best possible way. The strange adventures of a British coffee salesman.

On the Beach    Survivors of a 1950's style limited nuclear war bide their time in Australia, waiting for the radioactive cloud that will eventually arrive and claim their lives as well.

Once Were Warriors  A brutal view of a Maori family as they try to deal with the alcohol and violence surrounding their lives. Once they were warriors, now they just kick the shit out of each other in barroom brawls.

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest  Jack Nicholson's best role, he is the authority bucking inmate of a severe psychiatric hospital. His war with the head nurse has only one possible outcome, but it gives others hope where there was none before.

The Opposite of Sex  Christina Ricci is a 16 year old hellion who steals her brother's money and boyfriend and takes off leaving a trail of misery in her wake. Lisa Kudrow does a really good job as a bitter schoolteacher.

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Palookaville   Three inept wannabe jewel thieves plan and bungle a big heist.

Papillon Based on the true story of one of the few people to ever escape from the Devil's Island prison colony. Steve McQueen stars in this great tale of perseverance in the face of terrible odds.

Parents Leave it to Beaver gone bad... very bad. The young son of a picture perfect family comes to the realization that his parents are cannibals.

Paths of Glory   Stanley Kubrick's excellent WW I film about three men that are chosen at random to be executed as punishment for their regiment's inability to successfully carry out a stupid and suicidal attack. Kirk Douglas is their commanding officer who has to defend them at the court-martial.

Pee-wee's Big Adventure  Great surreal tale of Peewee's cross country attempt to track down his stolen bicycle.

Pink Flamingos    Gigantic, cross-dressing phenomemon Divine stars in this disgusting, but life affirming, John Waters film about a feud between two twisted families, as to who most deserves the title of "The Filthiest People Alive"

Planet of the Apes  (1968  version)   Astronauts crash land on a planet to find that apes are the superior lifeform, and human beings are hunted as pests.

The President's Analyst  A psychiatrist is summoned to give council to the President of the U.S.A. and becomes the target of foreign and domestic spy agencies.

The Princess Bride  A great fairy tale with beautiful princesses, evil villains, swashbuckling heroes, and friendly giants, and not too much kissing or sappy stuff.

Public Enemy  James Cagney is public enemy number one as he rises from being a young hood to being a ruthless bootlegger, leaving a trail of brutalized enemies and friends behind him, as well as breaking his poor mother's heart.

The Quiet Earth  A scientist wakes one day to find that he appears to be the only person left on the planet. A scant few others are eventually found, and a terrible tale is revealed.

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Raiders of the Lost Ark   Good old fashioned Saturday afternoon matinee-type cliffhanger/chase movie. Harrison Ford tries to save the Ark of the Covenant from falling into the hands of Nazi's.

The Razor's Edge    Bill Murray in a rare dramatic performance as a man who loses faith in humanity after experiencing the horrors of WW I. He then travels the world attempting to find wisdom and regain his faith.

Regeneration  Sigfried Sassoon, the poet and war hero, is sent to an asylum for insane and/or shell-shocked officers, as punishment for speaking out against British policy in the First World War. There he meets Wilfred Owen, another poet, and comes under the care of a psychiatrist whose job it is, to eventually send all the shell-shocked soldiers back to the Front.

Repo Man The punk rock story of an angry young man's initiation into the intense world of the repo man... and the search for a car with a dead alien in the trunk.

Reservoir Dogs  A jewel robbery gone terribly wrong... lots of blood... paranoia... cop torture... and no one listens to Mr.Pink, the sole voice of reason.

Return to Oz  A sequel, of sorts, to The Wizard of Oz. This is not a musical and has a much darker vision of Oz, a land decaying under the rule of an evil Queen and the Gnome King.

Return of the Pink Panther  The best of the Pink Panther/Inspector Cleauseau series. The legendary Pink Panther diamond is once again stolen, and only Peter Sellers, as the inept Inspector Cleauseau can get it back, despite numerous attempts on his life.

Richard III (1995 version)  Shakespeare's play reset in 1930's England. Richard masterminds a fascist takeover of the British crown. Ian McCellan is so evil, it's wonderful to watch. One of the all time best screen villains.

River's Edge  Based on a true story of a group of teen age friends, one of whom murders another, and their attempt to ignore or cover up the deed. Murder aside, this reminded me more of what High School was like than pretty much any other movie I've seen.

Rollerball    Sci-Fi vision of a future where the corporations have taken over from nations, and war has been replaced by a bloodsport called Rollerball.

Rock n Roll High School   Cheesy but enjoyable story of poor teenagers oppressed by their terrible Principal and how they are delivered from this evil by The Ramones and their #1 fan Riff Randal.

Rock and Rule  Great animated movie, set in the future, about a mega rich egomaniac Rock star's attempt to summon a Demon during one of his shows.

The Rocky Horror Picture Show   DO NOT rent this movie... watching it requires lots of audience participation. This is the musical tale of a young couple whose car breaks down in a storm. They are forced to take refuge at the mansion of a transvestite Dr. Frankenstein (or, in this case, Dr. Frankenfurter).

Roger & Me   A very funny, yet thought provoking, documentary about the film-maker's attempt to get an interview with the CEO of General Motors. GM is closing it's plant in Flint, Michigan (the film-maker's home town), causing great economic hardship and turmoil.

Rosencrantz and Guildenstern are Dead   Hamlet as seen through the eyes of two doomed bit part characters. Many discussions of fate and destiny as they trudge, inevitably, to their demise.

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Salvador  Oliver Stone's best movie. James Woods is a jaded American journalist in El Salvador just as the right wing government oppression  reaches its peak.

Scrooged   My favorite Christmas movie. This is an updated version of A Christmas Carol starring Bill Murray as an Ebenezer Scrooge- like television executive.

Simple Men  Hal Hartley film about two brothers who go off in search for the truth about their father, a jailed former baseball star/anarchist.

Slacker A stream of consciousness journey through the youth culture of Austin, Texas. Some of the oddest characters ever gathered on film.

Slap Shot    The all time best sports movie ever. The coach of a losing minor league hockey team resorts to goon tactics to bring his team success. The three bespectacled Hanson brothers steal the show as the child-like but violent stars of the team.

Sling Blade  Billy Bob Thornton's tale of an idiot man-child, who having at one time murdered his mother and her lover, is once again released into society. Great performances by, of all people, Dwight Yoakam and John Ritter.

Sorcerer   Four men, who have hit rock bottom (really rock bottom), and have nothing to lose agree to undertake a very dangerous job in order get back to civilization.

Soylent Green  Charlton Heston (the big jerk) stars in this futuristic story of overpopulation. The environment has been so damaged that there is pretty much nothing left on earth but human beings... but what to feed them???

The Spy Who Came in From the Cold  Richard Burton stars in this realistic Cold War tale of a Western spy who is left high and dry on the wrong side of the Iron Curtain.

Stalingrad    A terribly real war movie chronicling the battle for Stalingrad. This bleak German film tries not to judge, instead it just tells an intense and horrific story.  Saving Private Ryan has nothing on this legitimately scarey tale.

Star Wars  What can one say... this is just a great adventure film. Good versus evil... weird aliens... cool spaceships... dashing heroes. All the right elements in the right proportions and twenty-odd year later it still doesn't look dated.

The Stunt Man  Nothing is as it seems when a fugitive takes refuge as a stunt man on a movie set.

Straight To Hell   Alex Cox's Spaghetti Western tribute/spoof. Cool in the classic sense of the word. Funny in the ha-ha sense of the word.

Swimming to Cambodia   Spalding Gray's brilliant one man, spoken-word show about the filming of The Killing Fields and the history of Cambodia.

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Taxi Driver   Robert DeNiro has pretty much made his career from playing the role of Travis Bickle, a Vietnam vet taxi driver who attempts to impress a teenage prostitute by trying to kill the President of the USA and a pimp. This film was influential in the attempt on the life of Ronald Reagan.

The Terminator  Arnold Swartzenegger is the relentless cyborg from the future bent on the destruction of the mother of the one day savior of the human race (whew).

The Thief of Bagdad (1940 version)  A great fairy tale with princesses in peril... paupers who are actually princes... noble thieves... genies... an lots of great special effects.

The Thing (1982 version)  John Carpenter's horror story of a group of scientists at the South Pole who unearth a terrible space alien that can assume the form of any living creature.

The Thin Man  Detectives where never so debonair as Nick and Nora, the socialite sleuths who bicker and drink their way through this twisted murder case.

The Third Man  Orson Welles' story of murder and deceit as a man travels to Vienna to visit a old friend only to have him turn up dead, then, suprisingly, alive again.

This Is Spinal Tap  A great mockumentary about the semi-famous, but mostly pathetic, heavy metal band Spinal Tap and their ill-starred tour of America. So funny I'm still laughing.

The Three Musketeers (1973 version)  If you ever need to know the definition of the word Swashbuckling, this movie should suffice. A classic tale done very well. Action packed... suspenseful... humourous... cleavage... sword fights. What more could you ask for???

Thunder Road    Robert Mitchum wrote, starred and directed this film about moonshiners and the men who drove the cars just a bit faster and more crazily than the revenuers who were trying to catch them.

Time Bandits  Terry Gilliam's story of a boy who finds himself riding shotgun with a group of midget burglars who possess map of all the passageways from one point in history to another.

Total Recall    Based on a Phillip K. Dick story, Arnold Swartzenegger is a somewhat average Joe who finds that all of his memories are false, and he is actually a secret agent who possesses knowledge that can change the future of humankind.

Trainspotting    The colourful life and times of a gang of Scottish junkies.

Treasure Island (1934 version)  Starring a young Jackie Cooper, this unDisneyfied version has all the atmosphere and character that the book was awash with.

Treasure of the Sierra Madre  Humphrey Bogart gives a great performance in this tale of gold and greed and three prospectors who hit the mother lode.

Twin Town    The grimy side of Wales is revealed in this story of two hell raising twins who set out to avenge an injury done to their family by a crooked, but influential businessman.

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The Usual Suspects  Several career criminals are coincidentally (apparently) gathered together in a police line up and use the opportunity to plot a crime.

Videodrome   Strange, intense film about the blurring of the line between TV and reality.

Villa Rides  Pancho Villa's story is given the spaghetti Western treatment. Good and even sometimes funny performances by the likes of Yul Brynner (with hair) as Villa, Charles Bronson as his blood thirsty side-kick, and Robert Mitchum as an American reporter.

Vinyl    An obsessive record collector interviews other obsessive record collectors and asks them the questions they wish he wouldn't ask.

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Walker Based on the true story of William Walker, an American soldier-of-fortune who was hired by millionaire Corelius Vanderbilt to overthrow the Nicaraguan government in the 1800's.

The Wanderers  Set in New York in the 1950's, the Wanderers are a gang of Italian teenagers battling to protect their turf as the times change around them.

Welcome to the Dollhouse  The world as seen through the eyes of a misfit 13 year old girl. This film pulls no punches and offers no happy endings.

When We Were Kings  Documentary about the classic 1973 "Rumble in the Jungle" boxing match between Mohammed Ali and George Forman. Ali emerges as a true warrior/poet/hero.

Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?  Elizabeth Taylor and Richard Burton get to act out scenes from their own marriage. They portray a bitter, bordering on crazy, couple who have invited a naive young couple over for a few drinks, and a bit of terrorizing.

The Wild Bunch  The film that invented dying in slow motion. Sam Peckinpah's Western tells the tale of an outlaw gang battling the law and the changing times.

Wild Zero  Japanese... Rock n Roll... Zombies... cool beyond compare. Starring the band Guitar Wolf.

Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory  The screen version of Roald Dahl's "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory". A surreal, sometimes nightmarish morality tale about a group of children who win a chance to tour the factory of a famous and reclusive candy maker. Gene Wilder is brilliant (and a bit scarey) as Willy Wonka.

Wings of Desire  Wim Wender's great film about an angel who gives up his immortality for the love of a trapeze artist.

The Wizard of Oz  A girl gets carried away from Kansas by a tornado and arrived in a magical land of munchkins, witches and talking scarecrows. Her only hope for returning home is to ask for the help of the Wizard of Oz... as if you didn't know already.

Zelig  Woody Allen's fake documentary tells the story of the 1920's human phenomenon, a human chameleon... Zelig.

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